November 5, 2019

Especially if you’re a woman, if you don’t already have a satisfying and sustainable morning routine, I encourage you to develop one. Experiment until you find the activities and timing that most support your needs,...

October 28, 2019

I’ve never been a morning person. I’m a classic night owl. Growing up, my family sometimes called me “the Bear” because my morning demeanor was like that of a grumpy animal who had been prematurely woken up from hib...

September 7, 2019

It’s spring 2009 in Portland, Oregon. My partner, David, and I are nestled close under the covers with a laptop on our shared lap. It’s pitch black in our room except for the light pulsating from the screen.

We are w...

August 14, 2019

People seeking relationship help come to therapy thinking one of three things: (1) they think they are doing something wrong or feel they need to work on their personal issues, (2) they voice complaints about their...

July 1, 2019

Perhaps the most important thing I’ve learned about sustainable relationships is this: People have a tendency to confuse the need to work on their relationship with the actual need to work on themselves.[1]

Because p...

March 29, 2019

We’ve all found ourselves here at one point or another: We give another person (often an authority figure, but it can be anyone we meet or know) more credit than they later prove to deserve only to feel shocked, bli...

February 9, 2019

Does Achievement Contribute to Our Sense of Self-Worth or Diminish It?

Lately, the subject of accomplishment is coming up a lot in my private practice with women of all backgrounds as well as in my personal life. Som...

January 14, 2019

Photo credit: Lisa Blair 

Dear Artist, dear Lover of the Creative Life,

Remember that the Creative Spirit is always present offering you clues to follow, like breadcrumbs in the forest leading you on a trail to a pot...

June 22, 2018

So many of us are especially suffering and struggling right now whether it's about our shock and horror at the treatment of immigrant children who are being separated from their parents and detained at the U.S. bord...

June 15, 2018

The recent deaths of two prominent figures in the public eye—Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain—have brought the issue of suicide, once again, to the forefront of our consciousness. So many of us are deeply affected by...

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All of the Apple is Me: The Art of Self-Love

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